Adulting

I have dealt with this for a long time – the thoughts that are ingrained into our heads telling us that we are broken when in reality we are perfect.

I spent a long time copying others so I could fit in. And by 25 I had it all (at least that’s what my mother told me) – in was married, had a degree, a house, and friends. I had it all? But who says this is what we are supposed to want? Who are these people that make up these rules?

So while I appeared to have it all on the outside, in the inside of was really unhappy. One day I’d had enough and decided to change things. I went back to school, interned, volunteered and, for the first time, felt like I was doing what I was supposed to do.

This change had unforeseen consequences. Since I was happier it inspired happiness in Damon which, in turn, made our relationship stronger. However, this new happiness made other relationships weaker.

Very quickly, those who weren’t my true friends or unsupportive of my new life simple fizzled away. No dramatics, no problems – they just disappeared. There are times that I miss these relationships. But then I realize that I am so much happier with my life now without them. I don’t miss the drama or the stress. Life is so much easier and happier without all of that mess.

So for me I choose my happiness. I can’t control others and really don’t want to. I just want to enjoy my life by being who I am and not by being what others want me to be.